As far back as I can remember, I’ve always been an optimal target for bullies. In fact, as the “girl with the cooties”, bullying has always been a constant issue: from kindergarten at St. Agnes up through high school graduation. Admittedly, the bullies changed from year to year, but they all saw me the same way. I was the perfect target: I am highly sensitive and don’t fight back…For those who have never been bullied, you’d be surprised to learn that the actually bullying isn’t the worst of it. The collateral damage it sustains upon your social life is devastating. You see, when you get picked on often enough at school people start to notice and a reputation develops. Now a “loser”, you’re essentially walking around with a scarlet letter tattooed to your forehead.
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The Nature of Belief Systems
Societies and cultures are a byproduct of belief systems, which provide a means of constructing the “stories we tell ourselves to define our personal sense of reality” (Usó, 2015, p. 1). In this sense, they are meaning paradigms that define the nature of our lived experience. Societies benefit because belief systems create a mutually agreed-upon reference point for all its members. When everybody complies, belief systems carry social consequences that allow it to develop a surface appearance which mirrors “objective truth”. In this respect, their existence is not dependent upon a believer, but society as a whole. It remains an integral component of our culture, woven throughout our history until we as a society begin to question it. Only then can systems of belief loosen their definitive hold upon our daily lives.
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…the go-it-alone mentality
Recently, I came across an article online titled “The Psychological Cost of Being a Maverick”, Essentially, this article cites research which debunks a common American myth of individuality as the key to personal freedom and control. Since I was curious, I decided to download the research paper this article referred to (Greenway, et al, 2015). After reading it, I felt is was worthy of a blog post on two unique fronts. Firstly, in a older post I discuss the notion of personal identity as a hot-air notion…After re-reading this post, I feel there is much more to say on the subject if identity. Where are the grains of truth? What role does identity play in our lives?
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Shame, invalidation, & a little baggage
So what exactly is invalidation, and why is it so important? Marsha Linehan, Phd., founder of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, defines invalidation as trivializing, punishing, judging, or ignoring a person’s thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and identity (Linehan, 1997). In order to understand the importance of this concept it is vital to differentiate how its definition in the field of psychology is unique. A quick review of Merriam Webster’s online dictionary yields the following definition: Invalid: “being without foundation or force in fact, truth, or law…logically inconsequent.” (invalid, n.d.)
