Understanding Shame…

In a previous post I review a favorite self-help author of mine, Brene Brown (link above). I first learned about her from a now-famous Ted Talk video (see link above). Through her work, I was first introduced to the concept of shame: “an intensely painful feeling that we are flawed, and therefore unworthy of accepting and belonging” (Brown, 2006, p45). In this post, I’d like to continue with this train of thought & share some insights on how to recognize shame. While no real preventative cure to shame exists, if you are aware of what triggers feelings of shame, you’re empowered to grow beyond its confines. What follows are insights I’ve recorded in an old journal based on Brene Brown’s work on shame resilience….

Personal Identity – on being full of hot air…

One night after my family went to bed, I began my homework. While sifting through journal articles, the above quote jumped out at me. In light of recent affairs, it forced me to stop and think. At this point in life, I’m working hard to overcome old patterns and “get unstuck”. In addition to working on a Master’s degree, I’m trying to pay off some debt, and lose weight. As I work on accomplishing these goals, (and overcome a few old vices), I hope to maximize my efforts with a bit of radical self-responsibility. The idea that my hard work could yield another hamster-wheel experience frightens me.

Ego vs. Shadow

I found this strange table in an old journal titled “ego vs. shadow”. It described the consequences of denying certain parts of myself while presenting other parts to the world. I’m sure its a byproduct of the Jungian and Transactional Analysis stuff I’ve been reviewing. Since I thought you might find it entertaining, I’ve reproduced it here. This divisiveness of self starts out with a description of my hidden self and lived self. Keep in mind, I wouldn’t describe it as an iteration of theory but instead application of insights.

On Being Contrarian…

As a mother, therapy student, and healthcare worker, it seems the majority of my time is spent in the care of others. As a Healer INFP personality type this endeavor suits my personality for the most part. However, as time has progressed, I’ve come to the realization that I’m becoming the adaptive reaction to others’ needs. I have so little say in who I am becoming. Everybody’s “baggage” tends to pile up after a long week. When I review the endless needs, thoughts, feelings, and desires of the people I care for after a long week, an “F’d” up hall of mirrors presents itself. Within each individual’s worldview are a set of perceptual distortions and I find I become lost in the mixed. I am unseen behind what other people tend to project upon me….

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Arrested Development??? (Erickson)

Erik Erikson proposed a theory of personality development that includes eight stages.  In each stage we face developmental crises in order to develop a sense of identity alongside interpersonal beliefs through interactions with significant others (Broderick & Blewitt, 2010).  According to Erikson, two potential outcomes can result depending on how we address and resolve each developmental crisis [for each stage]…